I've seen parts of this movie before, but never the whole thing together. One time I saw the first and another time I saw the second half. That makes a whole. I thought it was pretty good but I liked Shaun of the Dead better and I never got why it has as 91% rating on rottentomatoes. Maybe I should've watched the whole thing because I definitely enjoyed it more now.
A British cop, Nicholas Angel, is really good at what he does. In fact he is a little too good. He is making the rest of the force look bad because of his outstanding numbers so what do they do? They send him to a tiny English town in the middle of nowhere with a crime rate of 0. Angel takes his work super serious and finds life in the small town difficult at first. There is a serious lack of action. First there are some underage drinkers and a shoplifter but after that all he does is look for someones swan.
Next thing you know, people just start dying. Pretty brutally too I might add. The town and its police force just say everything is an accident because in Sandford, there is no crime. Eventually things start to get pretty stinky and Angel begins looking into it. Not soon after, Angel spots a hooded figure who seems to be doing the murdering. Little by little Angel and his new partner, Danny (sweet name), who is the funniest character in the movie.
SPOIL TIME
The movie is set up to lead you to believe that Timothy Dalton is the bad guy. Me, with all my movie experience could see right through that though. It's like when you watch Law and Order, the most obvious guy is never the one who did it. Well I was wrong. He was a killer, but so was the rest of the town. I forget what they called themselves but all of the most important townspeople started a little cult and killed anyone who would or could do harm to their town. Nicholas and Danny find out about them one night and the next day they have one heck of a shootout. Good prevails and Nicholas stays in Sandford for good
CONTINUE
Favorite Scene : This happens in the spoiler but you don't know how or why so go ahead and read. When Angel finds all the bodies, I died laughing at the face that the gold mime guy was making. The shoot out was pretty entertaining for comedy too.
Favorite Quotes : “Is it true that there's a spot on a man's head where if you shoot it, it will blow up?”
“Everyone and their mums is packin around here!”
“Ever fire your gun in the air and yell aaaahhh!”
“If we don't come down hard on these clowns, we are going to be up to our balls in jugglers”
Lots more that I can't type
Rating : 7 almond joys. It's not the 91% rating, but I still liked it. It's worth seeing once, maybe twice (all the way through). There is more action in this than you would think.
Alternate Ending : Tough to say. The Brits get drunk and burn the town down? Seems like it could happen. I think instead I'll go with a prison break out. The police seem incompetent enough that it could happen and the towns people seem organized. This is like the third alternate ending I've done and I just ruined the spoiler. I wonder if it's happened in the other posts too? Too late now, another shoot out occurs except this time for all the fish and chips he could ever want, they hire Val Kilmer. He gets the towns folk to recreate that scene from eat. It's awesome.
What I would do if I was the main character : This is starting to become a common theme. Chill out. Maybe with more people skills, I you could've gotten the other cops on your side way before the end. I also would never go outside and just watch Danny's glorious DVD collection.
What happens in the sequel : Need to come up with a new bad guy. A gone but not forgotten, archenemy of Nicholas has found where he is and is hiding out in Sandford. The killing starts up and it turns out to be Michael Caine (budget permitting, if not than its Cedric the Entertainer).
What to take away from the movie : These two British guys are funny in everything, Timothy Dalton still has some swagger and English people say the C word (seaward) a lot.
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Cheerios
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