Candy and a Movie: Movie # 29 Talladega Nights: The Ballad of Ricky Bobby

Talladega Nights: The Ballad of Ricky Bobby

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0415306/

Hello to readers from the U.A.E and Bulgaria. Can't say I know a lot about either country but Arsenal is sponsored by Fly Emirates so that makes them o.k. with me.

I'm a ginormous Will Ferrell fan. It's surprising that it took almost 30 movies for him to show up. Alas Talladega Nights is the story of NASCAR driver Ricky Bobby and his two first names. Movie starts the night that he is born. Ricky's dad is driving his mom to the hospital at like 105 mph, slams on the breaks and pop, Ricky is born. It's actually more of a sloshy sound than a pop. Skip forward 10 years and the dad shows up for Ricky's career day. It's the first time he's seen him too. Dad says the famous line “If you ain’t first, you're last. He then gets kicked out of career day and Ricky doesn't see him again until he is an adult.

Ricky is now an adult. He just grows up so fast. Ricky has become a pit crew member for a NASCAR team and we see him at a race in Talladega. The driver of his team comes in to pit and gets out of the car because he has to go to the bathroom. Drivers are supposed to just go in their suits, everyone knows that. The crew chief, Michael Clarke Duncan (who I like) doesn't like what he's seeing. The driver is now at a concession stand getting a chicken sandwich. Fun fact: The driver is the director. He usually shows up for one scene in most of his movies. Duncan asks all of his crew members if one of the wants to go fast. Ricky says I do and has now become a driver. He does quite well and gets to be the full time driver of the car. My favorite scene in the whole movie is the interview after the race. He doesn't know what to do with his hands and keeps raising them up. It is beyond stupid, and still kills me after watching it like 10 times.

Things go well for Ricky. He wins enough races that his team can take on another car which his best friend Cal (John C. Reilly) drives. They become a dominant team with their shake and bake and slingshot tactics. I think that most peoples favorite scene is the dinner that takes place. They have a table full of fast food that the mother “slaved over”. She happens to be a babe by the way. Ricky's two sons are named Walker and Texas Ranger and are also at the table. Ricky says a long grace to baby Jesus in which Cal adds his own views on how he likes to think that Jesus likes to party. Dinner ends with Ricky and his wife making out. If nothing else, just youtube this scene.

Ricky wins another race, this time in reverse and his team goes out to a bar to celebrate. Things are going good until jazz music starts playing. Everyone looks to the jukebox and there is Borat except this time he's french and clean shaven. His name is Jean and it looks like he is another new teammate of Ricky's. I forget how but Jean pins Ricky's arm down and says he will break his arm unless he says he loves crepes. After a few attempts to get out, Ricky's arm is broken. After cutting through his cast, Ricky enter the next race. He gets a giant sponsorship sticker on his windshield and of course has a gigantic crash. He runs around in his whitey tighties like he is on fire. Next scene shows Ricky in a wheel chair because he thinks he is paralyzed. He isn't but still stabs his leg to try and prove it. Later he gets back in his car to see if he can race again but the day ends in him running around in his underpants again. Ricky gets fired, Cal steals his wife and he moves back in with his mom. The trifecta.

Walker, Texas Ranger and the newest pizza delivery boy Ricky are all starting their new life. The boys were quite the delinquents and now granny (Jane Lynch) is teaching them how to act like humans. Ricky bumps into his dad again who has taken up the job of getting Ricky to stop being afraid of going fast. This involves a cougar and taping supposed drugs under his car while being chased by the police. Somehow it works and to celebrate, they all go out to Applebees. Ricky's dad can't stand the feeling of everything going right so he gets himself kicked out again. Ricky chases him down and the dad says that he was high when he said if you ain't first, you're last than it's stupid. Ricky is bummed.

Have I mentioned Amy Adams yet? She had one scene in the beginning and finally shows up again. Looking good as usual, she tries to talk Ricky into driving again. Ricky says he is auditioning to be on the real world and if that doesn't work out then he will be a polite crack dealer. Amy Adams gives a speech that is so overly dramatic that it's funny. They bang and Ricky comes back to racing and what do ya know, it's the Talladega race.

SPOILERS

He wins the race because it's a sports movie and 99% of the time they win. 99% of movies also don't end with Ferrell and Borat kissing but this one does that also. So there you go.

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Favorite Scene: The what do I do with my hands

Favorite Lines : So many.

“I like to think of Jesus as a mischievous badger.”

“Susan, I've never heard you talk like that... Are we about to get it on? Because I'm as hard as a diamond in an ice storm right now.”

“Your teacher wants you to go slow, and she's wrong because it's the fastest who get paid and it's the fastest who get laid.”

“I like to picture Jesus as a figure skater. He wears like a white outfit, and He does interpretive ice dances of my life's journey.”

“She said "No, you're wrong." I said "You got a lumpy butt."

“Abracadabra homes”

“No one lives forever, no one. But with advances in modern science and my high level income, it's not crazy to think I can live to be 245, maybe 300. Heck, I just read in the newspaper that they put a pig heart in some guy from Russia. Do you know what that means?”

“It's a movie. It won the Academy Award.”

“Dear 8 pounds 6 ounces... new born infant Jesus,don't even know a word yet.”

“'Cause I like to party.”

And my brothers favorite line “Well let me just quote the late-great Colonel Sanders, who said..."I'm too drunk to taste this chicken."

Rating : I know that a lot of people weren't into this movie. They say that it's just another Will Ferrell movie and they are all the same. That is why I love it though because Ferrell never makes me not laugh. 7 Life Savers

Alternate Ending : I was going to say that the dad comes around and they are one big family but now I kind of like things being a little flawed. Too perfect is too cheesey.

What I would do if I was the Main Character : In the extended version, he has to choose between his first wife and Adams in the end. Oh is that a decision. Did I mention that the wife is a babe and Adams is looking good as always. Wife is hotter but Adams is a better person. I might go long term and choose Adams. Also I would've played a real sport like basketball or something.

What Happens in the Sequel : I'm not sure why this wasn't called Daytona nights but the second one will be at least. Instead of having to beat Jean, Ricky now has to race against and beat his dad who is now married to his first wife. I think that sounds funny, jus sayin.